The Book or the Cover?

Posted on July 15, 2010


It’s hard, really hard to write about deeply personal stuff. I’m grateful to all those that left comments on my last post…glad to know I am not alone. Its overwhelming almost made me cry because there I am in my little cocoon thinking woe is unto me, nobody feels the way I do….and there you are….all in the same shoes…thank you.

Before I go completely off topic. I want to talk about my past. It is easy to say that my past has shaped who I am now and will probably affect who I am going to be in future. Now I don’t know about you but I’ve done some real stupid stuff. It may just be me; maybe you haven’t made a misstep since you came out of the womb. Just maybe all I am saying right now is like Greek. Maybe. Or maybe you are like me and wish just like this word document, you could press delete or ‘ctrl+z’ to undo all the mistakes and plain stupid things you’ve done in your life.

Many times we look at people and think we have them all figured out. ‘Come let me give you this person’s gist’. ‘Can you imagine she did so so and so’? That’s what somebody said to me last week about somebody else. It’s easy to sit there and judge with the ‘how could she?’ and ‘can you imagine?’ but walk a mile in her shoes and see if you may not have done worse. It’s easy to judge the person who steals if the worst crime you think you’ve committed is to lie. It’s easy to call the person who is pining for unrequited love a fool, until you have loved somebody who handed you back your heart in pieces. Do you see what I mean? It’s easy to judge somebody until you hear their story. Then all of a sudden they don’t look so bad…in fact maybe you can begin to see them as human.

Two weekends ago in Manchester I went to get my ears pierced. Lol the nature of the piercing might have people giving me the side eye but do I care? No.  However what was interesting to me was my friend. She had to wait for me while I went in to have my ears pierced and the look on her face when I came out was priceless. She had a ‘get me out of here now’ look on her face. To be fair you couldn’t really blame her. I had only chosen the most gothic looking place with attendants with more face piercings than face. On one level I understand how the place could have looked scary or unholy but on the other hand I started to think. Now the person who did my piercing was so sweet and helpful, calming me down and making sure it didn’t hurt. Sure she had piercings but what if each piercing represented a story, a piece of the puzzle that was her life? So often we prejudge people based on the way they look. I should know I’ve done it plenty of times. It might not be piercings, it might be pink hair [which I think is cool by the way :-)]; it might be revealing clothes…who knows? We take one look and say, surely he/she can’t be a serious person! If they were they would look like how I think a serious person should look. Face it. That’s what you do, that’s what I do. We try to fit people into our own categories of right and wrong.

God doesn’t do that with us, so why should we do it with His creation? Like I was saying earlier there are things I wish I could undo, like rewinding my life to the first time I stole meat from the pot […lol…might as well do things right from the get go] to maybe not dating somebody who would up and leave. What a perfect life that would be if it was only filled with perfect memories of a perfect life. However you see, it is because of my imperfections that I can identify with and understand your own imperfections. If I was perfect then I would judge your imperfect self. So please why do we uphold others to a higher standard than we hold ourselves?

I’m writing this as much for myself as I am for whoever might be reading it. It’s not just with our acquaintances or casual friends but even in work situations, we could get so much more from our co-workers if we took the time to listen to their story. To try and understand where they are coming from. This is GlamTings and I believe that its audience are future leaders and up and coming success stories. However permit me to say that we could have a much wider impact if we recognised that the world is made up of different strokes.

Everybody has a story….what’s yours?


Posted in: C'est La Vie ?